when the moon is full she is at her most radiant. she reveals. she hides no aspect— she illuminates what has ripened in our lives in the last cycle— what has waxed and waned-
many full moons have found me amazed with what i was witnessing— revelatory and dream like.
pay attention to what culminates for you around the full moon.
as this moon waxes full (oct 1 2020) i find myself returning to messages received during prior full moons, reflecting on all that has been fulfilled and experienced–
i attune myself to the receptive state-
i contemplate what dreams i’m tending now-
<reflect.>
full moon early september found me with best friends, Lucy and Diana, in Lucy’s flower beds, gathering flowers——- the flowers and friendship brought me into a dream – like trance with the earth; a juicy manifestation of dream work.
working with flower medicines have connected me to my own spiritual portal—- I was sensing and understanding things about myself that I had not previously considered or understood. the agony of anxiety and depression became more than symptoms I was trying to manage with Pharmaceuticals: for once I was able to feel the repression of my emotions from my Mormon upbringing. I was able to sense the trauma from my hips from my first son’s pregnancy and birth. I was able to see but I wasn’t actually living my life I was following the template guided by falsehoods claiming to be spiritual truths. I felt like it was waking up to my life for the very first time: what were my interests? What was real to me? they helped me wake up.
flower medicine on a full moon.
go ahead and check out everlasting flower bouquets at Lucy’s farm —-
a full moon in august found me at my favorite lake —- a small alpine lake in the sierra nevada, sleeping under the moon with the monkshood, the queen of poisons, and columbine optimism–
on an aries full moon last october i found myself in the desert (along with march’s full moon of this year) with my love, exploring a psychedelic music festival. we were attending together as teachers in the mystic bazaar —-
it was another dream come true, to become aware of our connection to those all around us— how we’re better together, especially when we show up without knowing what’s next- it’s our connections that widen and heal us, expanding our realities.
to see how deep the mushroom can bring us to what’s perfect.
it was during this full moon that chris’s mom told us she found a perfect house for us to rent (which was astounding because we already were renting the perfect house.) we weren’t interested in leaving our cozy 100 year old ramblin’ shack— but guess what, we did move to that perfect house. more land to tend and a dishwasher! it was a big move for us– — growing out of a space and wanting more room to stretch out. chris built a mushroom cultivation greenhouse, we dug and planted another garden, and we continue to roll with the challenges and growth that come with interacting with more wildlife. Bears eat your animals and compost and pumpkins. Deer eat your morning glories and nasturtiums. the sunsets and wide open spaces sing to your soul. dreams do come true and the rent will even be a little bit cheaper, because miracles. the mushrooms are growing —- more on that in a future post!! wow!
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this full moon finds me excited and introspective– as usual there’s about 7 cauldrons i’m stirring at once, and this past moon cycle has been particularly challenging for me. i’ve been a tired momma, caring for two children, widening my motherhood work, tending and watering my many cultivations and dream seeds—- y’all ever swept the floor or washed the dishes or ignored emails?
i rehomed my beloved husky, a bear came and ate our ducks (again), and i lost a pregnancy that i was very excited about.
these experiences, especially the latter, drained me of all of my color. if i was a sink full of colorful potions and possibilities i was then quickly drained. life left me.
loss is real— i feel wizened by loss— i feel inducted to the society of secret sorrows, where women bleed when they didn’t want to bleed. i didn’t know that there were so many things i didn’t have a say over, the way we experience life.
i bled in the forest, a reishi grove, a place to bleed and release whatever dreams were no longer growing— trusting the wisdom of my body. I do trust the wisdom of my body; I am the wisdom of nature
with this full moon energy, may you wake up alive and sure of your being–may your longing for life animate you.
may the moon show you what is real and what is important on your journey—
with love,
in service to life
dolly